When you see the moon

Dear Ella,

I think it was Annie who told me about this quote from Neil Armstrong's family:

"the next time you walk outside on a clear night and see the moon smiling down at you, think of Neil Armstrong and give him a wink".

You of course loved the moon, the stars and the universe.  So after all my sighing last night - I headed to bed, and there peering down at me through my bedroom window was a huge full moon - not sure about the winking, but I smiled and thought about you.

Lots of love

Mum
xx
PS - full moon = very high tide, you would have been worried abut our river bursting its banks

The moon above Allington - smile :)

Big sigh

Dear Ella,

"Big sigh" - why? Well - it's just no matter what I do, or how busy I am - the fact is - you are simply not here.

I know in the normal scheme of things you wouldn't have literally been here - as in Allington on a long hot summers day.  Far more exciting places to be - washing elephants in Thailand, swimming off Greek beaches, dancing at festivals, eating nachos and drinking cocktails at Los Iguanas - any of these and plenty of others. But there would have been texts, exasperating calls, requests for cash, photos on FB, flip flops in the hall, piles of stuff, music blaring, dirty mugs and rallying calls to "sort myself out, cheer up and keep taking the pills".

So its a sigh of sadness, a sigh for what could have been and a sigh to "come on Jo - keep on going" -  what's done is done.

Lots of love

Mum
xx

Happy Birthday

Dear Ella,

Happy Birthday my beautiful girl

Lots of love

Mum
xx

So British

Dear Ella,

It's still "boiling'".   You would be pleased to be celebrating your birthday in hot sunshine -  U Bob pointed this out on his blog today about the Glastonbury bike ride this coming weekend.

Weather

The forecast for the West Country for Saturday, at the moment, on the Met Office web site, is a bright yellow sun, with the odd cloud and a temperature of 27C. Ella would be pretty pleased with this for her birthday weekend!

As cyclists we might like it a little cooler and appreciate the odd shade-giving cloud; however, be prepared for a scorcher (sun scream, shades, lots of water etc.)

How British am I? - Still cant quite believe its going to be totally hot, so still taking a "cardi" to work - and have to say it's jolly handy when a quick visit to the supermarket is required - it can be very chilly around the fresh food section.

Lots of love

Mum
xx

Hot and sunny

Dear Ella,

We are having a heatwave....you would love it.  Mojitos, shorts, flip flops, BBQ's, brown legs and just generally drifting around.

Missing sharing it with you, but grateful you are not stuck in the oncology unit - hot, oppressive and  airless, however - a timely reminder that there are plenty of others stuck there right now.

So trying to make the most of it - and as you can imagine that involves a lot of time "gardening".  Your strawberries have been quite good, there is a bumper crop of broad beans just about ripe for picking - but the star crop is going to be raspberries.  The canes you bought me for my birthday last year have gone mad and are groaning with berries - thank you.  If nothing else will make Sophie very happy.

Lots of love

Mum
xx

In good company

Dear Ella,

Hot weather, Gromit (as in Wallace) and Andy Murray - I think you would consider them all good company, which is just as well as you shared the front page of the Bristol Evening Post  with them today.

U Andy sorted it out - all in aid of the cause and raising more money, am listening hard and think I can hear you saying "it'll do".

Lots of love
Mum
xx

Two Mums

Dear Ella,

Been to Devon and back - took Grandad - very funny - top holiday quote "you plonker Mark"!  (and that was Grandad not me) - I laughed so much, I nearly forgot I was sad.

So given I don't have a Mum anymore (in the physical sense), I went in search of my godmothers - of which I have two.  Carol who you know very well and Brenda - not so well.   I got a whole heap of Mum hugs, encouragement, understanding and reassurance - at what point does a Mum learn to hug you like nobody else can?

Combine France with Devon, mix in Sophie away in Woolacombe and suddenly I managed 10 days without Sophie and only the odd text.  It felt good and I am sure it felt good for her.  In fact so good, I was even allowed to hug her (briefly) when I saw her this morning.  I hope she liked her "Mum hug".

With loads of hugs and love

Mum
xx

With Brenda

With Carol